Chris Cannon:
In this episode, I talk with Chris Cannon, a nationally recognized speaker and creator of The Confidence Academy™. With over 15 years of experience and hundreds of highly satisfied clients, his work has been featured internationally and frequently quoted by industry experts. Audiences often express their appreciation for the positive impact his award-winning, interactive, nontraditional presentations have on them. Chris provides practical, powerful strategies that produce real results and can be implemented immediately!
He skillfully teaches how to go from tragedy to triumph, from pitiful to powerful, and from regrets to rewards. As a committed husband and father with a strong belief in investing in people, he draws this strength from his family. Shortly after graduating from Eastern Michigan University, he began sharing his personal journey of becoming a victim of your own choices, which is transforming lives as far-reaching as the continent of Africa.
His story about decisions defining you, overcoming obstacles and self-doubt, while staying resilient and focused in the midst of adversity routinely brings audiences to their feet! Audience participants from entrepreneurs, employees, to guests at major international conferences walk away equipped and empowered with a sense of HOPE! This supports his philosophy; “The battle is not lost unless you accept defeat.”
Chris has also incorporated his personal relationship experiences over the years, into a framework that now helps women attract marriage-minded men. Guyology Secrets and The Confidence Academy both, represent the legacy that he desires to live.
Our conversation focuses on confidence, self-talk, and self-image. Chris has some great tips on choosing the right words we say to ourselves and more on empowering us to a better life.
Chris Cannon
Confident On Command
Guyology Secrets
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WORLD’S FIRST ALL-ACCESS NETWORK TO HELP WOMEN ATTRACT MARRIAGE MINDED MEN THAT WILL KEEP LOVING THEM FOR LIFE…
Links From The Episode
Your body language may shape who you are
Inside the debate about power posing: a Q & A with Amy Cuddy
Four and a half years after her popular TED Talk, the social psychologist updates the research on posture and hormones, responds to critics and discusses her current work.
At the TEDGlobal 2012 conference, social psychologist Amy Cuddy gave the talk “Your body language shapes who you are,” in which she detailed the effects of “power posing,” based on research by herself and other scientists working in the field. Cuddy delivered a beautiful talk that resonated with our audience and the idea went viral, going on to become one of TED’s most watched talks ever, with more than 39 million views as of February 2017.
The original scientific paper and her talk inspired numerous studies and more research on the effects of posture, all part of the process of science at work. As Cuddy herself explains, this is the normal, expected progress of science – and one reason the job of a scientist is never done. Yet during this process, a debate arose in the social science community about the robustness of some of the findings on power posing. For instance, some results that Cuddy quoted in her talk have not always replicated in later studies, and in the context of broader concerns about a replication crisis in social psychology and other scientific areas, there has been aggressive criticism of her work by some.
In numerous interactions over the past few years, we’ve been impressed by Cuddy’s commitment to science and by her passion for her work. In light of the recent debate, Cuddy participated in a series of Q&As with TED science curator David Biello about her original study, the effects of power posing and how her views and thinking on this fascinating topic continue to develop.
30 Seconds on Power Poses
Doorway Drill
Like anything, becoming a Jedi Knight requires constant exercise.
“You can practice,” Jordan told me, “by practicing these things every time you walk through a door. The doorway is the reminder that you have to practice.”
Every time you walk through a doorway, think of it as your mentor, your coach. Do these things:
a) Straighten yourself up. This is important to me. I tend to slouch. I probably add an inch to my height now when I walk through a doorway.
b) Smile. Even when you fake-smile, it lowers stress and anxiety. I need this. It’s better than a drug.
c) Head up, Chin up, Open Body Language. I don’t know. Just try it. It works.
I think if you fake “c”, then it won’t work. I imagine situations where I DESERVE to have my chin up and head up and then I really feel it. That’s the practice.
One thing I know: What’s inside your body and mind, creates the world outside your body and mind.
What’s inside you becomes like a pebble you throw into the middle of the ocean. It ripples out and hits every shore.
Source jamesaltucher.com/blog/5-incredible-things-live-charmed-life
Episode Transcripts
Episode Transcriptions Unedited, Auto-Generated.
Tyson (00:15):
Welcome to the social community and show where it’s our goal to help you learn, grow, and transform, transforming, and pursuing to become today. I’m talking with Chris cannon. Chris is a nationally recognized speaker and creator of the competence Academy with over 15 years of experience and hundreds of satisfied clients, his work has been featured internationally and frequently quoted by industry experts. Audiences often express their appreciation for the positive impact is award-winning interactive. Nontraditional presentations have on them. Chris provides practical, powerful strategies that provide real results and can be implemented immediately. He skillfully teaches you how to go from tragedy to triumph from pitfall to powerful and from regrets to rewards as a committed father and husband with a strong belief in investing in people, he draws his strength from his family shortly after graduating from Eastern Michigan university. He began sharing his personal journey of becoming a victim of your own choices, which is transforming lives as far reaching as the confident continent of Africa.
Tyson (01:11):
He has. He’s very, very deep in this confidence based on this and what surrounds that self image. And also we talk a lot about that. Some good practical advice in there, some good really good tips on self-talk and, and being aware of that. And these words we choose very, very critical. A lot of times we neglect to, to see what we’re telling ourselves, the things that we tell ourselves on a head. A lot of times, you’d never tell your worst enemy, the things you’re telling yourself, the way you’re acting, the way you’re conducting just to yourself and, and how we degrade ourselves. It’s very powerful and he has got some good techniques and some good lessons and different things in there with this Bailey when we talk about, so without further ado, I hope you enjoy our conversation with Chris.
Tyson (01:56):
Chris, welcome to the show. I appreciate you getting on here. I look forward to having a quick chat here.
Chris (02:02):
Thanks for having me. And I really appreciate it and like the work that you’re doing. So keep up the great work. I appreciate it.
Tyson (02:08):
Thank you. Likewise. Likewise, I’m glad we got to connect here. I’d like to, I guess, start off with how, why did, did you, did you come up with a confidence Academy? I think that’s one of the things you, you, you really are into. And I kind of wanted to talk more about that.
Chris (02:23):
The reason being is because I’ve been doing motivational speaking for about 15 plus years now, and it never fails. You know, when I go to different places that I speak, people want to talk to me afterwards. And one of the common themes that come up is they’re in their own mind, their inability to do certain things. So some people want to write a book. They know I’ve written a book. And so they asked me different questions. And over time I would take hours and hours talking to people one on one and it hit me, you know, why not create something that’s leverageable and you can allow them to access it whenever they want to get the results that they
Chris (03:00):
Want because everybody’s situation is not the same. And so I began to get on this quest of really studying what holds people back, you know, fear is one thing, but there’s so many people that even succeed in the face of fear. So it’s like, okay, what are those people have if these other people don’t? And so with that, you know, the confidence Academy was kind of birthed out of that desire to help people who really had value to offer to the world, but for whatever reason was being held back from doing so
Tyson (03:30):
What were the, I guess the most common things you were seeing,
Chris (03:35):
The most common things is I’m not enough, you know, what do I have to offer the world that they will want to listen to me? You know? And I think a lot of, a lot of people feel like because what they know and what they have is theirs. They’re like, wow, people value this. I mean, you’ve looked at it at a Tony Robbins or, you know, Gary Vaynerchuk or whoever the case may be. It’s like, what makes their story or their platform any more or less powerful than anybody else’s it’s like, we all have our tribal people who can really learn from us. And sometime people don’t want to learn from those that have millions and millions of followers. They want that one person that doesn’t have any followers, but they have a phenomenal story that that person can connect to. And so the common thing is that people feel like they’re not enough.
Chris (04:20):
You know, what do I have? That’s really a value. And the fact is everything, no matter who you are, two things that we’ve all experienced in our life. We’ve all experienced helplessness. We’ve all experienced some kind of pain. And so it’s like when you think about hopelessness, that’s the thing that bonds us together. Whenever we see a phenomenal movie, we don’t want to see the boring movie where somebody was born, a billionaire and their life was a goat. Now we want to see the person who was given up for adoption almost died. And somehow he came back and became a millionaire and say 20 million people in the process. We want to see that story, you know, so that’s the hopelessness, but you know, a lot of us feel like we’re not enough. And we don’t realize that the pain that we have is a very pain that somebody else is trying to look for a solution for it. It looks like we can share our pain and how we got through it or our journey that gives her permission to number one, know that it’s possible, but also as possible for me, because a lot of times people think that that’s something is possible, but it’s possible for everybody except me. So when they see people that are like them, that overcame their, you know, story or painful experience in less than know that that’d be as possible for them as well.
Tyson (05:32):
Yeah. You see that even even, I guess, for lack of a better term, the racial thing or whatever, like, Oh, you’re this, you know, this type of person from this area or this color skin, if they can do it, I can do it too. Cause I look like that and I’m not specific. That’s very interesting. What is one of the, I guess the one or two things that help people kind of know there are enough or break through that, that, that roadblock of not feeling like they’re enough.
Chris (06:02):
I think the, one of the biggest things is very, very simple. Just looking back at a past reference. No. So for me, I mean, I’m a, I’m a father, I’m a husband, I’m an entrepreneur. And so, so with those three things, every single day, I’m facing some kind of uncertainty, something that I don’t know, I haven’t been faced with. I might’ve failed out before, but for me, my point of reference is my high school basketball coach. Okay. When I think about all of the times that I’ve run, I’ve thrown up, you know, pushups and five o’clock in the morning practice. And it’s like, okay, if I got through those things, what I’m facing here, I can definitely give you those things. You know? I don’t have to run, I don’t have to get up five o’clock in the morning. I’m not going to vomit or anything like that.
Chris (06:46):
My life is not in jeopardy, so everything else I can pretty much figure out, but I have that point of reference as my basis and all of us, we have some kind of point of reference that we can refer back to, to say, you know what, that point in time, I didn’t know how I was going to get over it. I don’t know how I was going to get the money, or I didn’t know how this is going to work out, but you know what it did. And if I can get through that, then I can get through this because so often we’re, we’re married to our current story or we’re married to our past story that keeps us stuck, but rarely do we find the other story that had us stuck, but we purse or fear and we didn’t even know how it was going to get over it. And so I think the biggest thing is referencing to areas where we’ve already succeeded in to give us proven evidence that we can continue to go forward. Because the only thing it is is just proof. You know? So often we look for proof as to why we’re not enough while we’re ugly, why we’re broke, why, but we just don’t look for the right reference points. And I think that’s one of the biggest things.
Tyson (07:50):
So I guess the thing that comes to my mind is, is reframing your situation in a way, is that correct? Exactly. Okay. Yeah. That makes sense. So saying, okay, this is how it is now or today or whatever it is I’m facing this now. But if I reframe this, you know, I had something similar before, and I know I got through
Chris (08:08):
I’m here today is that that’s kind of accurate what you’re saying. Exactly. And I don’t care who you are. All of us we’ve helped at least one person, you know, and I think the biggest thing in life is that we will let ourselves down way quicker than we’ll let anybody else down. That’s true. And so it’s like, when you think about that one person that you’ve helped, that one person that look up to you, that one person that depend on you think about them for all of your choices. If they’re going to drive you forward, don’t think about yourself, think about doing it for that person. And that within itself will pull you in, even push you to wherever you’re trying to get to a lot quicker than if you just stay stuck and depend on yourself and stay stuck to your own story.
Tyson (08:45):
Definitely. One of the things I wanted to touch on, on, on, on I guess I kinda, I kinda wanted to, I guess, stay on the theme of confidence in a way I liked kind of where that was going. I think one of the big things I see, and then we talked about, I know we talked about before with was self esteem. Can we get,
Chris (09:02):
Yeah, so, so a big thing is, you know, we use confidence a lot and confidence is, is your ability to do something. You know, I have a lot of confidence in tying my shoe because I’ve done it over and over again. But when it comes to self-esteem, that’s really the issue that people have in self esteem is just the image that you have of yourself, internal image that you have of yourself. And that’s the very thing that keeps people stuck. You know, so a lot of times we use confidence and self esteem interchangeably because people are more familiar with the term confidence and they want to be more associated with having confidence. But whenever somebody uses the word, self-esteem a lot of people, they immediately want to disassociate with it because they immediately think of somebody who’s depressed. They’re medicated, you know, all of the negatives, but it’s really just the internal image that you have of yourself.
Chris (09:53):
And when you, even when you hear the term self-esteem and I talk about this in a minute, but our language is even so critical because we’ve associated negativity with self esteem. And whenever self-esteem is really talked about is always somebody that has low self esteem, right? But when somebody has high self esteem, we look at them as arrogant, you know, as highly confident. Exactly, exactly. But it’s like, I think we should introduce the term high self esteem back into the language because that’s what it is, you know? And I think somebody should not be demonized for having a positive self image of themselves. It’s like we live in this culture where negativity is so profound that we want to demonize people for thinking highly of themselves, you know, and they don’t get me wrong. I think there’s a difference between somebody that’s having, you know, high self esteem and somebody who’s just arrogant and a jerk.
Chris (10:44):
And they think that I didn’t walk on. That’s totally different. But in terms of self esteem is really just the internal image that somebody have of themselves. And unfortunately, most of our self esteem was developed and created and shaped and molded in the imprint period between the ages of zero and six, you know? And so a lot of us, we have self-sabotaging behavior, which was resulted in what somebody said or didn’t say or did or did not do. And a lot of times it does come from language because so much of our lives is reinforced from things that we were taught at an early age. We don’t really understand how powerful our language are. And so the prime example real here. So when you talk about things that lower yourself esteem is us in the things that we’ve been communicated. So for instance, we’ve been taught as a kid to when you do something wrong, you say, you’re sorry.
Chris (11:37):
So you think about this for a minute, you did something wrong, you already feel bad about yourself. Then somebody is telling you to say something negative to yourself because you think about it. If somebody is across the street and you say, that person is sorry, is that a negative or positive perception is negative, right? Yeah. So why is it that we’re taught to say it to ourselves? That’s just reinforcing negativity. So that kind of helps to diminish our self esteem even further. And I know we don’t have a lot of time, but all of us has four fears. And one of the fourth fear is the fear of being wrong. And we’ve heard the term self fulfilling prophecy before. So if I have this negative image about myself, I have negative self esteem. I have this negative language that I’ve been programmed to tell myself, then I have this fear of being wrong. It’s like, if I already have all these other negative references about who I am as an individual, the biggest fear that I have is being wrong. So I want to be right, because all of those things already point me in the right direction. Then I’m somebody who’s low value, low self esteem, you know, low self worth. I can’t do it. Who am I? And so many things are radishes, you know, reinforces those things, right?
Tyson (12:49):
Yeah. That’s the thing that’s self-talk right. That, that story in your head, that, that, that dialogue that you keep telling yourself, I never thought of using the word, I’m sorry. As you know, kind of demeaning yourself a bit. I always, I do feel like sometimes people use it as a crutch or if I say, I’m sorry, I, everything kind of will smooth over. And I don’t really, I don’t really have to be, sorry. I don’t want to have to learn any lessons or whatever here, but I like that I’m going to stop using that, that term. I, I like the way you frame that with the, with the self esteem and self image and his self-talking stuff that we’re kinda talking about right now what, what kind of, can somebody start, start doing, that’s really gonna help accelerate this into a positive direction.
Chris (13:30):
I think one of the biggest thing is really becoming a police of your own language, you know? So instead of saying like, I’m sorry, say I apologize. Okay. Because that’s really what it is, you know, it’s like, when you apologize for something, there is redemption there, you know, because you know, you apologize can lead to guilt, but sour seeing, I’m sorry, at least a shame, you know, and it’s like, shame is, is a, is a attack on who you are, but you know, guilty in and saying, you’re you apologize, that’s an attack on something that you’ve done. You can separate from that. You know? So I think, I think really becoming a police of your own language even, you know, saying things like I can’t, you know cause a lot of times we don’t even realize it, but we lie to make ourselves comfortable.
Chris (14:20):
Right. Hey, will you go here with me? You know, or are you available on Friday? No, I can’t do it. No, that’s, that’s really not honesty. You know? And a lot of times when we’re not honest, we have internal conflict with ourselves that reinforces the negative head talk. So instead of saying, I can’t say, I choose not to. Right. That’s more powerful and it’s more accurate. And it’s more congruent with who you are as an individual, because it also displays the power of choice. Because when you say I can’t, there is no choice in that. Now it just, the victim mindset that a lot of people live with. But when you say I choose not to, it’s like, wow, people hear it. They might feel uncomfortable. They might even get pissed off, but they respect it. Cause he was like, wow, I never had anybody to me.
Chris (15:04):
I choose not to. And that person is honest because I probably wouldn’t have said that. You know? So, so a lot of, a lot of like language patterns, you know, that are disempowering, you know, and there’s so many different things that people say that’s, that’s disempowering to them. So for instance, even when somebody, they mess up on something, man, I’m dumb, I’m stupid. Or they identify themselves as something negative. I’m always late, you know, early bird or I’m a, I’m a night out or I’m a whatever. And so often we identify with these things that we’ve been programmed to condition to be identify with because it’s like, okay, if, if somebody says they’re a night owl, but somebody said, listen, starting next week, if you go to bed at 10 o’clock, I’m going to be a million dollars in a month. Now you’ve told you, you’ve just immediately changed.
Chris (15:56):
So it’s all about a choice. But I think the more that we pay attention to the things that we say, we don’t realize how powerful our words are in reinforcing our behavior. You know? So what happens is like our language reinforces our behavior, our behavior reinforces our language and it just becomes a cycle. So it’s like, at what point do you just stop? And the easiest thing to stop is our language because it’s like the things that we do are habitual, but a lot of times we can break those habits just by reframing the things that we say.
Tyson (16:28):
Yeah. And I use that technique a lot. I like that. What other ways with the Canon, a couple of things, is there any other trigger words or, or popular words that bring you into that mindset? We don’t even consciously think about
Chris (16:42):
One of the biggest things and also too. And I typically do this in my workshops. Now. I remember UCLA did a study years and years ago. And it’s interesting because our language like communication, all communication, you know, words only make up 7% of our language. Sure. You know, so you have 38%, which is Tom, but 55% is body language. So the majority of our communication is our body language. And so there’s ways that we can even speak to ourselves through our body, regardless of the things that we say, because a lot of times the things that we say reinforce how we feel and it reinforces how we look and feel even in our body. And I remember there is there was a study done by a lady named Amy Cuddy probably about eight or 10 years ago called the power pose, you know, pop the rise. Now
Tyson (17:34):
I think she did a Ted talk as well, too.
Chris (17:37):
Yeah, exactly. That’s really good. And so that’s one thing that I encourage people to do as well is is practice doing a power pose? You know, whether it’s the Superman or superwoman, whichever one, you know, you want to do, but do that. Cause I’m going to say like do it in the mirror, but there are some people that have so much shame that they can’t start there. You know, sometimes you, you do it in the mirror, but turn your back to the mirror. And maybe over time you can face the mirror to actually see yourself as that. But what I tell people to do is do a power pose and smile the whole time you’re doing it because number one, it reinforces things, you know, within your body. But it also reinforces things in your mind because you think about it when we smile and when we frown, we activate and stimulate the left and right brain. So there are certain things like, like we don’t even think about it, but our muscle fascia in our faces stimulate and activate the left and right brain. So when you do a power posing, you smile, it stimulates and reinforces things that are like, you know, related to your confidence and self esteem, but more so just your internal self-image, but also your, your head saw,
Tyson (18:47):
You know, another good technique I tell people is every time you walk through a doorway, when you walk to that doorway, smile, chest up and you, and you kind of, it’s a simple thing and you’re not looking in a mirror. I never thought about that. But every time you walked through a door, if you stand up, you smiling and then you also, you get to walk to a conference room or meetings with that. You’re instantly gonna start to just kind of come in there and that with that big smile and that big confidence, and that’s a nice way to not have to look in the mirror, which is nice. And every time you can just do it in your, around your house, you put a little post it on top of your doorway or some of that. And just to kind of remind yourself or something that you can help that I think that helps a lot too. I’ve helped people with that as well. Virtual high five. That’s pretty good. I got it from a, I think Jordan harbinger, something that I heard it and I was like, well, that’s another good way to do it. And I never, when you said that about the mirror, I never thought about people not being to look themselves in the mirror. That’s something that just never occurred to me. And if you can’t, I think this doorway drill will help you be able to start to build that confidence and look yourself in the mirror. That’s awesome.
Chris (19:46):
Yeah.
Tyson (19:47):
What about these, these different things in the realm of social media where they’re helping or hindering or whatever’s happening with that is what are you seeing,
Chris (19:56):
Man? I think I’m about to become very unpopular. You know, the thing is, is, you know, people would disagree with me, but I think, I think social media is I won’t say the biggest thing, but one of the biggest things that kills self esteem, confidence, but it reinforces negative self head talk, you know, because we don’t realize as humans, we naturally compare ourselves to people, you know, and a large part of that is just for our very survival. I mean, we compare ourselves to the different things. It’s like, okay, I’m out in the woods. And I see this figure that looked like is nine feet tall and I’m only six foot. I need to compare myself. Okay. Because they have a better chance of killing me than me surviving. So we have a natural tendency to compare ourselves. And when you’re on social media, you see at least a thousand, if you look for just one hour, you can see a thousand things that will prove how horrible you are, how broke you are, no matter how much money you got, how horrible your relationship is, how horrible you are with your children, you know why you don’t eat.
Chris (21:02):
So you can find so many different, horrible things on social media. But what people fail to realize is that most of what you see online is not real. Most people would have one picture, that one picture that they put up, man, that probably took hours and hours of getting a right setting and the right mood and the lighting. Like they, they spent a lot of time Photoshopping, if you will, without Photoshop that specific image, you know, and the thing is, is, you know, people, they’re not honest about their full life because I’m like, listen, if you’re going to post something, post everything. Yeah. You know, let’s post, you know, when you were late on that bill, how you felt and when you were crying, because your kid did this, you know, or when you woke up in the morning, you smell your own breath and you almost fell out less pose like everything. And so when you, when it comes to social media, it really damages people’s self esteem because they’re, they’re comparing their reality to somebody’s fictitious story that they really made up that they themselves know is not real.
Tyson (22:06):
Yeah. I, it’s funny. I think back to this, I have a friend he’s got a pretty large Instagram account and we do this acrobatic yoga class and stuff together. And there’s this one thing he did he tried to do some kind of flip or something to that. And it’s just hard when horribly horribly, horribly wrong. I want to post this, but I haven’t, I haven’t got it yet. So I can’t. And I was like, well, why don’t you post it? And let people know, Hey, look, this is the first time I’ve ever tried is look where I’m at. Let’s pick back in a year and see my progress. And he’s like, I can’t do that. People are gonna think I’m shitty and I can’t do this. And it’s like, wow. Like I like posting those failures. I think it’s, I love it. I like, I like posting the weird crap that happens and
Chris (22:47):
Because they can identify with it, they’re normal just like me. Right. You know? And I think people want to be human as like, like I think social media is a dev where it’s sort of like, it could be a great thing, but I think so often people are just scared to truly be themselves. And they, they think they have to be who, whatever would get them likes and shares or whatever, and not realizing that look they’re real. You will probably get you more likes and shares than the fake you. And you’ve probably got some enemies that don’t like you because of the fake, you know, falsification that you posted. But, but I do think that people are, are scared to be themselves. And it’s one of those things that, you know, it’s an addiction that once you start, you can’t stop to a certain extent because it’s like, when you, when you post something, you get a lot of likes and you know, you got to worry about this.
Chris (23:37):
Somebody comment on it. And if they comment on it and I didn’t like their comment or say something back about their coming out, are they going to be mad at me? You know? So it’s, it, it causes so much anxiety within humans, period, you know? And I think it’s one of those things that we all don’t realize. And I’m putting my I’m saying, we meet me, put myself in it. We don’t realize how much of an addiction that it is because it’s so common. You know, it’s like we know heroin, crack, all of those things, alcohol, those things are very addictive, but it’s like social media is the one thing that universally all 7 billion people eventually will have this same thing in common. And so, because of so common, we don’t really look at it as an issue. But when you really look at the depth of relationships, that whether it’s people in your home, your kids or whatever, or you go out to restaurants and you see people looking at their phones, it’s like, that’s kind of telling you where we are as a society and is fracturing our relationships because a lot of us know that we should be doing something different, but we’re so drawn to him.
Chris (24:40):
And I had to get back to a status update. I gotta find this other thing, the posts, or has it been a week? And I haven’t posted anything, then people are gonna think like, you know, whatever, you know. So I think it caused a lot of anxiety, you know? And it reinforces negative head talk, you know, for a lot of us.
Tyson (24:55):
Yeah. I see that. So I was, I was noticing this morning stopped at a stoplight and, and I just looking around and it’s every single person I know that was on their phone. You can’t even stop at a stop light for 14 seconds and not pull out your phone. And I was just like, dang. I was, it blows my mind as I think too, I was, I talked to people all the time. I was like, if I was addicted to cocaine, we would have a problem, but this is the same mechanism. This is the same problem.
Chris (25:21):
Everything’s okay. Like, why is that?
Tyson (25:24):
It blows my mind and people just don’t associate the, the difference. And it’s modeled on that addictive behavior that variable reward system, it’s just like gambling, just like all these other things. It’s, it’s tricks your brain. And it’s hard. It’s, it’s taken me a long time. They really just break that habit. And my newest addiction now is how little screen time can I have on my phone? I have a app app on my Android phone by Google it’s like action dash or something like that or whatever. And my, my latest goal is to be under two hours of screen time for the day. Some days I get it. Some days I’m like three hours. I’m like, dang. I’m like, I was on my hold too much today. But what I was noticing is my phone will just be on and I’m not doing anything on it, but the screen is on a book is playing or podcasts and these playing and it’s kinda messing with my time. And then I noticed, then I look at it and, Oh, there’s a message. Okay. What is this? You know? And I’m like, Aw, man, I’m scrolling through this thing and what am I even doing? I’m leaving. You know, it’s like, you’re saying, looking for that, that reward looking for that, that validation or whatever it is, who I am, look at, how everybody loved that I’m funny or whatever so much we can unpack with that. I know you’re short on time.
Chris (26:35):
The other thing too is, and I’m sure you might’ve experienced this as well is like, sometime you, you go on social media for something very, and by the time you get there, two minutes later, you forgot what you even went there for. I’m like, I’m guilty, you know, every morning,
Tyson (26:53):
Oh, that’s a good quote or whatever I was reading and I post something and then next thing I’m know. I’m like, Oh, who’s the 49ers did what, Oh, what’s going on with that?
Chris (27:00):
What am I doing? Definitely. Definitely couple quick questions real quick. Is there any habits recently you’ve added or removed from your life? Yes. So there’s habits that I’ve added. One of them is getting up every morning by six and drinking 32 ounces of water. Okay. The other thing is meditation. Cause I’ve learned that even with, you know my exposure to like social media and just the internet, the computer, like my mind is continuously racing on the next thing, the next idea. So many things. And it’s just like, I’m always on. And I noticed that since I’ve been meditating, it’s like my mind kind of calmed itself. You know, I sleep better. I feel more rested. I’m more alert, aware of my senses are a lot more, you know, in tune. So those are, those are two things. One thing that I’ve also instituted is when I have negative health, you know, self-talk I do something called I scramble.
Chris (28:03):
And what I scramble is, is just, you look in from your, your left into your right, you know, just back and forth. And you’re saying your ABCs, you know, and what it does is like, whatever your mind is on it, just scrambles the mind. And if it’s like a pattern interrupt, you know, kind of like if you and your, your, your son or somebody walking down the street and you just see like an orange monkey that starts chasing you, it’s like whatever you was talking about. Totally. Exactly. And so it’s like, like my scramble is a way for me to trick my mind into focusing on something else, just long enough for me to insert it there, you know, whether I’m thinking about something negative or where somebody said, or what I should have done better, it’s like, I’ll just do I scramble, you know, just, you know, eyes back and forth and just say my ABC’s out loud. Cause that’s the key too. Cause you to, you know, use your language to impact your ear. So I say it out loud and then I’ll just interrupt that pattern and introduce something else in my mind, you know, like, okay, what am I grateful for today? You know, I empowered today, you know that gratitude letter, who’s next on my list to write a gratitude letter for I like that. Yeah. That’s a good way to
Tyson (29:14):
The pattern, interrupt us. I like that. It’s nice. Well, we’ll all be sitting around sending a line in the grocery store, but I think we all know where we got it from.
Chris (29:26):
I love it.
Tyson (29:28):
Great stuff. I love what you got going on. I think where can people get ahold of you learn more about what you’re doing?
Chris (29:35):
Obviously on social media, if you, you know, look up Chris cannon YouTube my latest project, gynecology secrets
Tyson (29:42):
That come, you know, people can go there. And that’s kind of like where a lot of the confidence information is funneling. Also, you know, those that work with you fighting for you, the number four, that’s another one of the companies that are run pretty much. Those two places is, is where people get finally. So galaxy secrets.com is probably the best way. Perfect. I’ll link another thing and it shows for everybody. So don’t, don’t worry guys. It’s easy to get to. And then the last thing here on a social media show, we’d like to do a weekly challenge. I like to, I’d like to issue you the challenge to either something we talked about maybe, or an idea concept, whatever it is doesn’t necessarily matter, but I want to give you the opportunity to issue this week’s challenge. What I would challenge, if you don’t mind, it’s like two in the same challenge, somebody to do exactly what you said to challenge themselves to less than two hours of social media per day.
Tyson (30:41):
But I was also challenged people to do a power pose. And if you’re at a point where you have so much guilt and shame that you can’t look in the mirror, I would challenge you to still get in front of the mirror, but turn your back to it. And I wouldn’t do that at least every day for 14 days or more just to kind of get into that mindset of empowering yourself, you know, mentally through the communication with your body. I love that. So limit our screen time that doesn’t two hours and power posing, whether based in the mirror or looking away, whatever you gotta do to start. Definitely. Perfect. Perfect. Thank you so much, guys. I appreciate everything you have going on. Everybody check it out, check out he’s got going on. He’s got a lot of great stuff, a lot more, a lot more information, a lot more stuff, especially on that competency stuff.
Tyson (31:28):
I really, really love. I thank you for your time. I take your time and appreciate it, man. Thank you. You too. Wow. That was fun. I know it’s a short one, Chris. It was on a time schedule, but what great info in there. Lot of great things I love, I love, I love the different things about being enough and, and can’t, and I’m sorry. Those are good trigger words. I never really thought too much about, especially I’m sorry. So something we, we just kind of rolls off the tongue all the time and I’m going to be conscious about saying that I’m going to try and take that out of my vocabulary, trying to catch myself on that. If this is something you have a friend or family, whatever it is, colleague that you think this could help, please share it with them as the best way to support the show. Like what we got going on, you guys can connect with us all week long, the social community show on Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Don’t forget to subscribe on your favorite podcast app. If you’re new to the show, or if you’d like the video version, head over to YouTube and subscribe there. Everything we talked about here today and past episodes, you can visit social community and that show until next time, keep learning, keep growing, keep transforming to the person you want to become.
Speaker 3 (33:12):
[Inaudible].